question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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