i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
