I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
