So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
