Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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