he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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