talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
