so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
