Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
