we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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