My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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