none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
