I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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