Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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