I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You did what with his pubic hair?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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