Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
