I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
