I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
