I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
are you so shy because you have an std?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
In other news, I just burned my penis
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
