I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
