she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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