I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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