So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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