I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
