I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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