my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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