Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
