if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Randomize
