if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize