dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
