what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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