Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Randomize
