Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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