I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
