I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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