i just google imaged poop.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
