Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
My balls are so social today.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
