the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
