I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
