If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
