So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
