Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
