Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I cut my penus on the lid.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
