I feel like I'm in dance class right now
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
