You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
