hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
