last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize