wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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