I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
