try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
